For some reason I’m all about new products today. It’s Friday and I feel like shopping! Anyhoo, check out thefoodloop. I definitely think the Snook needs some of those for his next birthday. He’s a big fan of making elaborate stuffed roasts, and somehow I always end up holding massive pieces of meat together while he curses at useless kitchen twine. Plus we’re suckers for kitchen gadgets.

Presenting The Slanket, the “Best Blanket Ever.” My first thought was that it was a brilliant idea, and it really is the best blanket ever. But the more I looked at the site, the more perplexed I got. What exactly is it? They never really show you a picture of just the Slanket so you can see how it’s constructed. I assume this is because A) fleece is really cheap and easy to sew and you could just make your own, and B) you’d notice that you could achieve the same result for nothing simply by wearing your dressing gown back-to-front. (Link courtesy of Pop Culture Junk Mail.)

Wait. You mean it’s actually still possible to launch a “humorous” petition and get featured in an internationally-syndicated news story? What is this, 1996?

Damn. It. Sold out. I need to be quicker at these things!

Dr. Amy Jones: 1, Absolute Domestics: 0
Me: Hi, I had a message to call you regarding our cleaner, Nurgul.
Her: Yes… Nurgul contacted us this morning. Now, I understand you have a cat.
Me: Yes. Oh God, did she get out? Is she lost or something?
Her: No. Your cat is making Nurgul anxious.
Me: What? Anxious?
Her: Yes. She’s sent the job back to us to find you a new cleaner.
Me: That’s so weird. She’s really skittish, I swear!
Her: *laughing* Well, she must have done something to scare off Nurgul!
Me: That little shit…

So yeah, Nurgul lasted all of ONE visit. I even made sure to let them know ahead of time that we had a cat (so we didn’t get a cleaner who’s allergic or anything), so it’s not like it was a surprise. I wonder what the hell the little monster did.

An Experiment
This week dozens of “Absolut Kravitz” posters popped up in Sydney. I noticed several of them on my way to work Monday. They show Lenny Kravitz with a headphone cord wrapped around him, and there’s a line of text at the bottom with a website address. It was only as I was passing my third or fourth one that I realized that a few of them – notably not the ones on the automatic rollers – actually have three little headphone jacks built in. “Huh,” I thought. “I wonder if there’s actually an mp3 player in there or something.” So on my way home last night, I decided to pay the price of looking foolish and assuage my curiosity. I unplugged the iPod and plugged in. They do play music! All three seem to be playing the same song. I wonder how they do that. Must have cost them a bundle. But anyway, Sydneysiders now apparently have a free source of Kravitz should they feel the need to rock out in the middle of the footpath.

As I stood in line at Weight Watchers tonight, I started mentally composing a post about the dreaded “P” word – “plateau” – and how I was going to try to stay positive, even though my weight loss had stalled. I mean, I felt tired and bloaty, and the scale at home didn’t seem to be moving much, and I just knew that it was going to be another teeny loss. So I handed over my Passport and stepped on the scales…

Me: WAIT. IS THAT A SEVEN? DID YOU JUST START WITH A SEVEN?
Weigher: Can you stay still please?
Me: OH MY GOD, IT’S A SEVEN. YOU’RE KIDDING ME!

It’s official, folks! It was the most beautiful seven in the world. It was Seven Costanza. It was amazing. And you know what the seven means? It means I have lost over twenty kilograms. (20.7 to be exact, which is about 45.5lbs.) I have left the eighties behind and I’m in the Land of Sevens. I still can’t really believe it. It hasn’t sunk in. After basically staying the same last week, I dropped 1.4kg this week. Who’s the Biggest Loser? Kris is the Biggest Loser!

After the meeting I talked with our new leader Barbara about setting my official goal weight. She recommends I set it for the top of my weight range – that’s 78kg; only 1.4kg to go til I’m not fat! – simply because as long as I stay under that number, I get my meetings for free. So once I hit 78, I’m starting the Maintenance phase. I can still keep on losing though; I’m thinking 75 looks like a nice round number. I just can’t believe it. One week before my 29th birthday… and somehow the future seems a lot brighter!