After curry, three glasses of wine, and the latest episode of The O.C.
Me: …So, I thought that the accepted psychological basis for heterosexual man’s preoccupation with lesbianism was that they got to watch naked women without the presence of a man to make them feel all gay and stuff.
Snook: Nahhh, for me it’s just because there’s twice as much boobies.
Me: [after shooting wine through my nose] Dude! Can I put that on my website?
Him: Whatever…
Attention Sydney knitters! I’ve just gotten word from Meg that the Sydney Stitch N Bitch is going to be filmed by Better Homes & Gardens for an upcoming show! The only problem is that the presenter’s schedule means they need to film the spot… tomorrow night. We need to pack Hart’s Pub with as many knitters and crocheters as we can get. If you can hold a pair of needles, we want you there. It starts at 5:00 pm (which is a crap time, I know). Details and a map are available on the website. Hope to see you there!
Huh? I was just reading this BBC news story about the recent Japan-North Korea World Cup qualifier when the accompanying photograph caught my eye. Is that security guy carring a light sabre?? Now that’s a novel way to keep soccer hooligans in line.
Okay, remember when we played this before? I give you the setup for an Australian television advertisement that is currently pissing me off, and you guess the punchline and the product. Ready?
We crane in on a couple panting in bed, presumably post-coitus. The man is fidgety and disheveled. “Sorry,” he says. The Angelina Jolie-lookalike beside him grins. “That’s okay.” She rolls over to the night table as the wacky trumpets of sexual dissatisfaction kick in. As her partner covers his eyes in masculine shame, she moans with pleasure as she pops open… WHAT? And WHY?
Let the guessing commence. Your clues: This isn’t one of those ads that airs at 2:30 am. It’s been on every day this week during Days of Our Lives, which runs at 1:00 pm. You can tell this because the woman is wearing a tank top to cover her boobies, despite the fact that nobody – outside Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the women of Sex and the City – have sex with a top on. So it’s not that dirty…
And hey, doesn’t the new Survivor start soon? And the Rob-and-Ambah season of the Race isn’t far off. It’s a good time to TiFaux.
Hmm. I think Candy Sushi would be an awesome addition to this year’s Halloween party! Can somebody send me some Twinkies in, oh, about six months? (Actually, Twinkies don’t really get stale, do they? You could send them to me now.)
Oh my God. It’s a Hello Kitty crop circle. That rules! (Link courtesy of Ernie.)
“Questions Frequently Asked About TiVo, Answered by Someone Who Loves TiVo Too Much.” Heh. Of course, our own system isn’t an actual TiVo, but it’s changed our lives nonetheless. I haven’t watched live television in probably a month. I’ve discovered some great shows that are only on at truly absurd hours of the night. I worry when the hard drive starts to fill up and badger the Snook to get our second capture card hooked up (which, of course, will only exacerbate the problem). I wonder if we should get cable TV. (We shouldn’t. Australian live TV is actually pretty damn good, especially with the networks importing all the best US shows.) I feel embarrassment when I realize that everyone who visits my blog knows that I recorded Dancing With the Stars. Like I said, it’s a life-changer.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
At the last minute, the Snook and I decided to head out for a Valentine’s Day dinner so we got all gussied up – check us out; I wore the orange bridesmaid dress – and headed to the Lord Nelson, a pub and brewhouse that happens to have a very nice restaurant on the first floor. We sat down and had a look at the holiday set menu. “Shall we get it?” I asked. “But it has a seafood plate as the appetizer,” Snookums said, knowing that I don’t really eat seafood. “I’m game,” I said. A few glasses of wine later, out came the plate. There were four prawns, four oysters (two with strawberries and mangoes on them), two scallops with salmon roe, and an honest-to-goodness Moreton Bay Bug. Folks, I ate everything. I really did. The prawns were really good, but I’d had them before. I wouldn’t say I really love oysters yet, but they’re definitely growing on me. (The ones with the fruit were surprisingly delicious.) I was wary of the scallops for fear they’d be fishy, but they ended up being really good. (And the salmon roe – which looked like little orange tapioca balls and is pretty damn gross to contemplate – really did burst pleasantly in the mouth.) Lastly, the bug, as seen in the photo before you. Hell yeah, I ate that sucker. Cross him off my list. The Snook was absolutely floored that I was brave enough to try everything. The thing is, it was all delicious. I don’t know if it’s just that Sydney seafood is particularly good (which it is), or that I”m slowly developing my taste for this stuff (which I probably am), but I am definitely becoming a fan of the shellfish. Yum. The rest of the dinner was excellent – I had the chicken; the Snook the steak – but not nearly the phobia-challenge of the entree. Pretty cool, huh?
My name is Kris. I’ve been blogging since the 90’s. I live in Sydney, Australia, and I spent most of my career in the tech industry.
No AI used in writing this blog, ever. 100% human-generated.
Woot, my knee-jerk don’t-overthink-it pub-quiz answer was Iran which seems to be [✓]. I ‘knew’ it was more populous than…
Congrats and to many more 🙌🏽
My home economics teacher taught us to use “J cloths” as press cloths. (Cellulose cleaning cloths). The upside of using…
Special thanks to Matt Hinrichs for the site logo!
10 responses