web-goddess

Thanks to the TiFaux, I’ve started watching Days of our Lives again on a regular basis. Yesterday I had a marathon session where I caught up with the whole past week. I’m still reeling from the whole “fast forward four years” thing. I don’t buy for one second that Sami would ever get together with Lucas, nor would Roman ever marry Kate. Has everyone gone insane? And why is Phillip suddenly way older than Belle and Sean? The worst part of watching all these episodes back-to-back is that you’re forced to confront (through repetition) all of the crappy, crappy tricks the producers use to pad out the show. Each episode has had, like, three dream sequences! Which leaves me confused about the big Friday cliffhanger… Did that crazy Jan girl really kill Victor “Jennifer Aniston’s Dad” Kiriakis by throwing a stereo into his bathtub? I don’t believe it.

If we were having a wedding cake, this would be it.

[Edited to remove our mailing address]

This “engagement” is only a week old and I’m already getting annoyed. The link to our address is down. If you want to know it, please mail us. I’ve also deleted the wedding registry. God forbid my motives were questioned or people thought I was being crass.

If I had a kid, I’d totally dress him in one of these T-shirts. Hmm, I wonder if I could work that slogan onto some sort of cat garment…

I was just snickering along at this article about creampuff college classes and trying to recall if there were any at ND. Nah, even the weird ones I took – like “Ancient Wisdom, Modern Love”; remind me to tell you about that sometime – still had a lot of reading and writing and study groups to attend. So I was totally unprepared when “Notre Dame” leapt out at me. Check this out:

When Lou Holtz was at Notre Dame they used to give out a degree called Arts and Letters. – Don L.

Okay, first off, Don, Arts and Letters isn’t a degree. It’s a college. There’s the College of Science, the College of Business, the College of Architecture, etc. They’re like departments. And the one with all the humanities courses, like philosophy and languages and history and literature? That’s the College of Arts and Letters. What the hell do you think “B.A.” stands for? It doesn’t mean, like, finger-painting the ABC’s or something. In fact, it was the College of Business that was commonly known as the “creampuff” degree at Notre Dame (but only because everybody who failed out of freshman pre-med moved into marketing). Secondly, what was the point of mentioning Lou Holtz? Are you suggesting that a football coach has anything to do with the classes that are scheduled? Or that our last championship team only succeeded because they had easy courses available to them? Because that’s bull. Notre Dame has high entry standards for everybody, even the football team. We’re not Ohio State or Florida where we let every rapist and mouth-breather over seven-foot onto the team. Hell, every year we suck the chorus gets louder from the alumni to actually lower admissions requirements so we can get better players! So to conclude, “Don L.” was completely talking out his ass. Rant over. (Original link courtesy of Max.)

How to play Egyptian Rat Screw. I first learned that card game at the Joseph Baldwin Academy, a sort of summer camp for smart kids I attended in Missouri after the 8th grade. I then taught it to lots of folks at my high school and we ended up playing it at almost every speech meet. Our version was a little more violent than this one, though, as it involved a “false slapper” being required to put one of his hands under the pile until the next double. Yowch.

I got two new things delivered in the past 24 hours! The first is my sexy she19 T-shirt urging my fellow American women to “make their mark” by voting in the next election. Dressy yet political. I wore it to work today because I’m funky like that. Second is a big bouquet of flowers set to us by Ma and Pa Snook! The arrangement was apparently called “Golden Birds”, which explains the birds of paradise and weird little fake bird nestled in the middle. Ma Snook also made a point of including gerberas because she knew they were my favorite. Isn’t that sweet? Unfortunately the cat took one look at the arrangement and fled in terror to the bedroom. Thus the flowers have to live in the laundry room when we’re not home to prevent attacks.

Crap. I thought I had at least another 24 hours before I had to go on Amazing Race spoiler alert. Instead I fired up my Yahoo home page and there it was, right in front of me. Double crap. At least it only told which state the winners were from, which limits it to two of the four for me. (And actually that’s kinda good, because it means the team I hate didn’t win!)

Vote for Bush, get hit by three hurricanes. The facts don’t lie!

New Poll: What the heck do you wear when you get married by Elvis? I’m leaning towards the daggy tourist look – mostly because it’ll be the most comfortable – but I could be persuaded.