Get me the Elephant Gun.

“Get me the elephant gun…”
Oh, that Dr. Wong is such a card. Today’s procedure was even quicker and smoother than the last one. For some reason, though, this time it took a lot more anesthetic to numb the right side of my face. He’d poke and prod, and I’d go, “Nope, that’s still kinda hurty!” And he’d inject me with some more stuff. At one point, he asked Maria for, like, the fifth hypo of stuff, and she was all, “Really? More?” And I said apologetically, “I’m a horse.” That’s when he busted out the elephant gun line. Ho ho! Eventually we got there though. “Okay, you’re gonna feel some pushing,” he said as he gripped that bottom molar. Literally ten seconds later, that sucker was OUT! It’s hard to be all, “Damn, you’re good!” when you’ve got tubes hanging out of your mouth and half of it’s numb. He put in a stitch and then tackled the upper one. I had visions of the double-ended root pick again, but this one also came out clean with a minimum of yanking. And just like that, I was done! As he was writing up my antibiotics prescription, I mentioned that I’d written up the “root pick experience” on my website last time. “Can I have the address?” So if you’re reading, Dr. Wong, hello! I’m doing just fine. (He said something about printing this out and putting it on the bulletin board, which was very cute. I guess when your business is playing the role of Big Bad in everybody’s worst dental nightmare, you don’t get a lot of positive professional feedback…)

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  1. Re: DDS as Big Bad, I made sure to fall all over myself to compliment the doc and hygenist that did my root canal since they really did do an excellent job which enabled me to chew on both sides of my mouth again.

    That, and the whole dentists-have-the-highest-suicide-rate thing. Wanted to make sure they got their job satisfaction boost for the day. 🙂

    W-G PS: Any chance we could get a preview button for comments? I’m super error paranoid. 😉

  2. Dude, the mighty eisdom extraction of 96 and 97 was a miserable one. I “eat” novacaine apparently and they kept having to shoot me up like every 30 minutes because I was metabolizing it too fast. Miserable. My dentist was very cute though, so that helped.

  3. You’ve given me the courage to schedule a consultation with the oral surgeon. Ech, how do I hate the word surgeon. *shiver* I do however, love my dentist. He’s super.

  4. Brigita, DUDE. It’s been FIVE YEARS and you suddenly want a preview button? Sheesh! Okay, okay… I’ll get right on it. 🙂

    And definitely do it, Jenny. Despite the lingering soreness in my jaw today, I can already tell how much more “room” I feel like I have in there without those crazy upper teeth pointing out at ninety degree angles. And I’m totally looking forward to no more infections in the bastards…

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