Meeting of the Top Secret Twi-Hards Club
Today myself and four other ladies-who-shall-not-be-named (though three of them are bloggers and you could probably guess!) slunk into Hoyts Broadway to finally see the awesomeness that is Twilight. I was the only one that had read the book, so they were all coming to it fresh (other than certain details – LIKE SPARKLINESS – that I may have let slip). Anyway, I was pretty much prepared for it to fully suck… and it kinda did. There were a lot of cringeworthy moments, like the whole biology class scene and Jasper’s horrendous facial expression and Volchok‘s scenery-chewing. And it didn’t help that one of our group was pissing herself with laughter through all the intense romantic scenes. But at the same time… I also kinda LOVED IT. I know, I know! Yes, the silly hair, the brooding glances, the ridiculous special effects, all of it. It was just ridiculous cheesy teenage melodrama, you know? But so’s opera, really, and sometimes I like that stuff. And hey, some reviewers thought it was good! I don’t need to be ashamed for enjoying it… right? (I know. I suck.)
Donna
January 2, 2009 — 5:28 pm
Personally, I cracked up laughing at the tinkling bells when he sweated. I mean, sparkled.
And the 15 year old walloped me. Then she laughed, too.
Emily
January 2, 2009 — 6:27 pm
You don’t suck!
But for me it’s not the cheesiness, but the anti-feminism that I’m complaining about. Obsessive, stalky, boring boyfriend, girl with no personality who is certain (at 16!) that she is ‘irrevocably’ in love with said boring git. And supposed not to care about her parents or friends!
Hmmmm. I love me some cheese (v into musicals, f’rinstance) but advise agin this!
Kris
January 2, 2009 — 7:34 pm
I agree, I agree, but sadly my 16-year-old self would’ve still found him dreamy, even with the stalkiness and stupid hair.
(Wait a minute… Actually, I did date *that guy* in high school. And yeah, not my finest decision.)
But come on, even the Princess Bride is anti-feminist by some standards. Buttercup is mostly just a pretty face while all the adventure happens around her. (I once wrote a paper in a film class about how I’d reshoot it to make her NOT SUCK.) I think sometimes it’s okay to buy into these fantasy scenarios, as long as you can see through them. I’d certainly feel differently about the movie if I had a daughter who was into it. And I’d probably show her some photos of her Mom dating an emo tragic with bad hair to scare her into maturity. 🙂
Andrea Roceal
January 2, 2009 — 8:39 pm
Did you see these take downs? Sooo funny and yet disturbing.
http://quirkynomads.com/wp/2008/12/26/the-secrets-of-the-sparkle/
http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317857.html
Also, re: Princess Bride, after reading the book version, Buttercup is supposed to be dumb and non-feminist, but it struck me as more parodic than sexist. It’s a joke on the classic fantasy/adventure story. Twilight is clearly not aware that it is a parody of itself. 😉
Kris
January 3, 2009 — 9:24 am
Yeah, Buttercup’s a lot dumber in the book, but the movie could’ve still done more with her, I think. If Rob Reiner could change it to give it a happy ending, he could’ve at least given her a little more personality! Every other character is awesome, and poor Robin Wright just has to stand around looking beautiful.
Great links, Roceal. I read ’em all. I knew SM was a Mormon, but didn’t realize the imagery was so explicit. It’s just all so ridiculous.
(RPatts is still kinda hot though.)
Kevin
January 3, 2009 — 9:44 am
Ok, I haven’t read ’em or seen the movie. But one of my little sisters ran me through the basic plot outline of the film and all the Twilight books the other evening…vampire baseball(?) set to Muse; a book-long Romeo & Juliet ripoff, ultra-submissive heroine who foregoes abstinence once and ends up with a cannibalistic fetus; werewolf hanger-on who eventually gets to shack up with daughter/clone after putting up with Edward’s boring ass for several books, etc. etc.
Uh, no thanks. Honestly, it all sounds like Mormon-laced, high-school-Goth crap to me, and I’d expect I’d continue to feel that way unless I started spontaneously ovulating or something.
(But if/when I ever decide to get back on the dating scene, I’m totally going to Hot Topic to rock that Edwardian Sparkle…)
Ok, maybe not. Anyways, if you want a good vampire flick with an active, powerful female character, see Let the Right One In. It’s very worthwhile.