Author: Kris

  • Aftermath

    “Get me the double-ended root pick…”
    That, I submit to you, is the absolute LAST thing you want to hear your dentist EVER say. For the most part, though, my extraction went smoothly. I was really nervous but the assistant, Maria, was an angel and she really calmed me down. Dr. Wong had decided to do the left side (top and bottom) so he started by smearing around the teeth with some numbing gel. It tasted absolutely terrible. Then, with my iPod cranked up and Maria holding my hand, we started with the shots. I closed my eyes as he gave me six or eight shots around the area, including one to the side of my cheek and one in the roof of my mouth (which was the one I was really dreading). They didn’t hurt a lot, but the knowledge of what was happening and the general stress of the situation brought a few tears to my eyes. Within a few minutes the entire left side of my mouth was completely numb. Once Dr. Wong ascertained that I wasn’t going to feel anything, we really got started. (For the record, I didn’t have any gas. I don’t think that “twilight” option that some of you Yanks had is available here.)He started on the bottom tooth. “You may hear some cracking, and there will be quite a lot of pressure,” he said. He wasn’t lying. I think the bottom one was more painful than the top one, simply because your top teeth are kind of attached to your head but the bottom ones are just on your jaw. He was really putting all his weight on that molar, and the pressure was making my whole jaw ache. But before I’d even reached the end of “Sk8er Boi,” that sucker was out! Dr. Wong put a stitch in and we were half done. The upper tooth turned out to be a bitch though. Again, it only took about five minutes to get the tooth out, but a bit of the root broke off inside. The result was fifteen minutes of digging around and the aforementioned request for the “double-ended root pick.” He eventually got it though, and with another single stitch it was all over. The whole process took just under an hour.

    Afterwards, I didn’t feel that bad at all. We’d planned on taking a taxi home from Chatswood but I told the Snook that I felt well enough to handle the train. Dr. Wong had stuffed my cheek with cotton wadding but I didn’t look abnormally swollen. We got home an hour later and I changed the wadding, which was pretty soaked with blood. I took some ibuprofen – Dr. Wong didn’t think I needed a prescription for anything stronger – and had a bit of a nap. For the rest of the day, I just kept changing the cotton, taking painkillers, and drinking liquids. (I did make a mistake in drinking a milkshake through a straw. I didn’t realize you’re not supposed to use a straw at all, as the suction can interfere with the blood clots you’re supposed to be forming. I still had the cotton wool in though, so I think I’m okay. Incidentally, that’s also the reason you’re not supposed to smoke afterwards.) The Snook made me a lovely creamy risotto for dinner. I slept pretty well throughout the night and, aside from feeling a little groggy this morning, I feel great. Some of you guys really freaked me out with your tales of weeklong drug-induced stupors. I feel like I could probably even work today, if I had to. (No, Albert, I am not coming in!) Maybe the longer recovery times are related to the general anesthetic and not the extraction procedure itself. I’m feeling really happy with my decision to do it in the chair. Now I just have to wait a month before the other two come out!

    Oh, and I kept the teeth. 🙂

  • The Phone Rings

    The phone rings.
    Her: Hello, could I please speak to Mrs. Snook?
    Me: Excuse me? Who is this?
    Her: Is this Mrs. Snook?
    Me: This is Kristine Howard.
    Her: Oh, are you the new homeowner?
    Me: [with some force] No, I’m Mr. Snook’s wife.
    Her: [a moment’s pause, as I have clearly befuddled her] Oh, I see. Shall I call you Mrs. Howard?
    Me: Whatever. Who is this?
    Her: This is Kim calling from the Something Something Advertising Agency, and I’m just calling–
    Me: Kim? I just had two wisdom teeth pulled from my head two hours ago.
    Her: Oh, I’m sorry. I hope you feel better. Goodbye.

    I was telling the truth, but I think I may be on to a great excuse for the future…

    (Incidentally, the procedure went fine. The real pain hasn’t kicked in yet. I’ll post a run-down later in the night if I feel up to it…)

  • Odontophobia

    Odontophobia
    I’m off to have the crunchiest, chewiest dinner money can buy, because the Big Day is finally upon us! At eleven a.m. tomorrow a dentist is going to stick a needle in my mouth and then yank out two of my wisdom teeth. I plan on eating nothing but soup and Jello for a few days. Any other recovery tips? I’ll try to remember to get a good DeskCam shot of my inevitably puffy chipmunk cheeks…

  • Anne’s Boobies

    “The Straight Dude’s Guide to Brokeback.” The funniest part is that they include the fact that Anne “Princess Diaries” Hathaway takes her top off, which has been the Snook’s repeated excuse for wanting to see the movie for some time now. (Link courtesy of John, who hopes that UK men will be less squeamish.)

  • Happy blog-birthday to me!

    My blog is going to kindergarten, folks! That’s right; I’ve officially been blogging at web-goddess for FIVE years. (The archives go back a little further because I was blogging elsewhere.) As I have done in previous years, I’ve compiled some statistics about the past twelve months. Overall the trend was towards less posting and commenting (which isn’t very surprising given that it was my first full year not working as an IT drone). Here we go!

    What will 2006 bring? Definitely more cat pictures…

  • 100 Things We Didn’t Know This Time Last Year

    Here’s some amusing trivia for your lunch break: 100 Things We Didn’t Know This Time Last Year. BBC staff compiled it from news stories published throughout 2005. The one that immediately caught my eye was the assertion that the orange Monopoly properties are tactically best. This refutes the Snook’s longstanding belief that the red properties are the key to winning the game.

  • Help, Grammar Nazis!

    Help me, Grammar Nazis!
    We were just reviewing an ad for the shop with this copy: “What Ever Your Passion, Tapestry Craft Has Something For Everyone.” And I suddenly realized that “What Ever” should be one word, not two. Right? The dictionary only lists it as one word, yet upon Googling there are tons of examples of people saying “What ever happened to…?” Of course, I’m talking about the Internets here so those might be all idiots. At any rate, we’re now having them change it. I just want to be sure I’m right. Thoughts?

  • New Year’s Resolutions

    New Year’s Resolutions

    • I will get to my healthy BMI range, but I’m not going to beat myself up over how fast it happens.
    • I will run the Nike Women’s 10K and the City to Surf this year.
    • I will finally get my finances in order so I can enter my thirties as an honest-to-goodness grownup.
    • I will do my best to cut toxic people – both professionally and emotionally – out of my life.
    • I will read more books.
    • I will take a photography class so I can hang out with the Sydney Photobloggers and not feel like a doofus.

    Anybody else got any good ones?

  • Ball of Paint

    When the Snook and I next visit Indiana, we’re soooo going to see the world’s largest ball of paint. (Link courtesy of Pop Culture Junk Mail.)